So, I think I’ve decided to stop doing weekly updates on my weight loss progress. It was becoming too much of a focus for me when I stress out about something I tend to avoid it, rather than getting really dedicated. It all starts with one little spate of neglect and then I feel guilty and stop working on things all together. I don’t want to do this with my weight loss. This needs to be something that just becomes part of my life that I don’t stress out about.
I will still be working toward hitting my goal of weighing 160 by the end of the year. I will probably even do better since I won’t have stress about blog posts and a weekly weigh in holding me back. Some may think this means I’m just copping out, but that’s fine. I know myself and can already feel the weight being lifted from my shoulders. (LOL. No pun intended. Caught that on a second read through.) I may still post my progress occasionally because I will be happy with myself, but regular weigh-ins and such are out.
I’m also hoping that not having the stress of trying to post about weight loss all the time will help me to post more frequently about things that interest me. I want this blog to be updated at least 3 times a week and I think this is actually a step in that direction.
So, if anyone out there wants and update on the weight loss thing, you can always leave me a comment or email me. Until then I return you to your regularly scheduled program already in progress.
The hardest thing about being on the road so far is changing my mindset. I no longer have to get up and go to work at 8am five days a week. I won’t miss out on much if I take a day to just relax. I have all day tomorrow or the next, or the next. It’s hard getting used to having about fifty extra hours a week to do the things that are truly important. The main benefit is a lot less stress and less stress leads to less bickering with Faith.
It’s hard though, to realize when you are stuck in your old mindset because it is so familiar. The other day we were checking out some places in Eureka looking for a new place to work outside of the apartment because it’s just hard for us to work where we live all the time. We weren’t having much success finding a place with wifi that had good seating and power outlets. We’d decided to call it a wash and get gas before heading to the library with the really slow wifi for a less than optimal solution.
On the way to the gas station there was a natural foods store that we’d seen earlier and meant to check out for both groceries and work space, so we decided to stop in and check it out. I passed the main intersection where I should have turned before I realized what it was.
I could see Faith visibly cringe because missing a turn like that usually drives me batty. Trying to find a place to turn around without getting us run down and then making sure I don’t miss it again on the way back…wasting a lot of extra time. It’s infuriating.
This time though, I didn’t freak out. I decided that if there wasn’t another entrance to the parking lot from the street I was on that I would just go get gas and we’d stop there on the way back. It was easier to be laid back about it because I knew we weren’t under a time crunch. Faith and I were both really relieved at my change in attitude.
Do I know that it shouldn’t ever have been a big deal? Of course, but it was still hard not to overreact because all I could think about was all the lost time and frustration it was going to cause. Now I know I’ve got the time and it’s easier not to sweat the small stuff.
That’s the true gift that I’ve been given by living this life free of a “normal” job. Now I just need to be able to do that with all those little things that get under my skin. With just one little incident I already feel like a different person. I wonder how I will feel when I don’t even notice those things any more.